You were right. It hurts to walk today.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
