please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
