I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
