somebody snuck up and got me drunk
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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