I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
40s are totally the cure
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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