did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
