I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
