my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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