i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Randomize
