Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
