my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize