So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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