You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize