why didn't you poke me back
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
