He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
only you would photoshop your dick
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
