you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
