nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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