This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize