Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
