Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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