I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Randomize