I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
