u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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