Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize