I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize