How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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