oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
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Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
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Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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