You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
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