you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
My ass is underappreciated
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize