Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize