He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He has the fingertips of a God
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