She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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