it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
