dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize