I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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