You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
