It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize