If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
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