You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
