Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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