just survived the first fart of the relationship.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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