I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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