i just had sex bonerless
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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