This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You ruined the universe
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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