is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
The ass gains better be worth it
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