The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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