No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize