My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
