I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I don't think brook has ever known best
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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