hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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