yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
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We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
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Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
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