Do you still have your period?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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